Let’s face it. Getting through Valentine’s Day after a recent split can be tough for anyone, regardless of the circumstances. Perhaps you can relate to this struggle right now. The sting of losing your partner probably feels especially sharp if you know he’s with somebody else this February 14th. What if, to make matters worse, you’ve also discovered that you’re pregnant? You’re likely feeling shocked and scared in a way that’s difficult to even express if that’s the case. Know that you’re strong enough to persevere and eventually find your own best outcome, no matter what overwhelming obstacles you may be facing.
This Valentine’s Day is sure to be a difficult one. Perhaps every reminder that you’ve seen- each flower bouquet and box of chocolates- has hit you like a punch in the gut. Avenue Women’s Center is here to meet you in your pain and uncertainty. We’re an early pregnancy clinic with multiple locations in Chicagoland. Our caring, knowledgeable staff is available to provide accurate information on all your available options while offering ongoing emotional support.
Discover our free and confidential limited medical services at Avenue! We’ve been serving individuals from our own community and beyond for over four decades.
It Won’t Always Be Like This
Maybe you and your partner recently went through a breakup- mutual or otherwise. Maybe he’s cheating on you, or your relationship has been hard to define from the start because the boundaries were never really clarified. No matter what, his decision to become romantically involved with someone else is bound to be experienced as a loss. It’s normal to feel heartbroken or cast aside under these circumstances. Your emotions are valid. Just know that your feelings don’t define you. If you feel “less than,” that doesn’t make you so. And missing your partner doesn’t make you any less strong and capable of finding a solution. You’re a resilient woman who’s facing a painful (but temporary) situation. You’ll heal with time, even if it seems like your life is moving in slow motion right now. It’s important not to make decisions (regarding your pregnancy or anything else) as though you’ll be stuck in this same difficult place forever- because you won’t be.
Your Situation Doesn’t Have to Dictate Your Pregnancy Options
People who are single or questioning their partner’s loyalty are often more inclined to feel limited in their pregnancy options. Some of them may want to continue the pregnancy, but may feel unable to consider this option without the undivided support of a partner. Maybe this describes where you’re at right now. As you evaluate your next steps, try to keep an open mind about your partner or ex’s potential response to the pregnancy. If you feel safe going to him with this news, consider sharing your situation and expressing your feelings and desires. You may find help and encouragement (from him and others) in unexpected places throughout your pregnancy journey. If you don’t wish to speak with your partner, that’s certainly okay too! However you decide to approach this, your freedom to choose your own path remains safely in your hands. You can find all the support you need to pursue your own best outcome with or without his backing.
Surviving Valentine’s Day (Maybe Even Enjoying It a Little)
Maybe you sense that February 14th is just going to be a hard day to get through. Maybe you anticipate that you’re just going to need some extra support for a while. That’s okay. It’s healthy to acknowledge this, sit with your hurt for a bit, and explore constructive ways to cope. Here are a few tips to help you survive (and hopefully enjoy) this Valentine’s Day.
- Plan a Little Something Fun! Set aside time on Valentine’s Day for a special activity. Consider including someone whose company you enjoy, as this will probably make the experience even more therapeutic. You can use this time to get your mind off of Valentine’s Day, or you can lean into the holiday spirit by splitting a heart-shaped pizza or watching a romcom with a friend.
- Practice Self-Care. Take extra-special care of yourself on Valentine’s Day by engaging in a mindfulness exercise, writing in a gratitude journal, or enjoying a healthy meal (plus a little dessert). There are many ways to practice self-care, and all of them could be helpful as you continue to navigate your pregnancy journey. Check out our blog, 8 Methods for Self-Care During Pregnancy!
- Surround yourself with Support. Having a healthy support network is essential during an unexpected pregnancy, a breakup, or any other challenging life experience. Consider inviting caring and trustworthy people you already know into your pregnancy journey and healing process. Look for ways to grow your base of support. Building a community of helpers and encouragers is possible even if you feel alone right now. Avenue Women’s Center can be a part of your support system, while helping you find new ways to expand it!
Without a doubt, this has been a season of near-constant anxiety and uncertainty for the future. Circumstances like the ones you’re facing can hurt deeply, no matter how strong, independent, or resilient you are. Avenue Women’s Center is here to help you weather this storm. We’ve been navigating unexpected pregnancy challenges and other stressful life transitions alongside individuals since 1981. Our expert team is available to help you understand your unique pregnancy and all your options (abortion, adoption, and parenting) so you can take informed next steps. We’re a judgment-free, pressure-free zone.
Call, text, chat, or email today! Our goal is to make a difference that will help you look back on this experience next Valentine’s Day and feel at peace. You’ve got this!
The information provided here is general in nature. It is not a substitute for a consultation with a medical professional. Before any medical procedure, it is imperative that you discuss your personal medical history, risks, and concerns with your doctor. If you have questions during or after a procedure, your doctor should be immediately contacted. Avenue Women’s Center is not an emergency center. If you are experiencing severe symptoms, such as bleeding and/or pain, seek immediate medical attention. Contact your physician, go to an emergency room, or call 911.