Several years ago (I can’t believe I’m old enough to use phrases like “several years ago…”), I took a college course on human sexuality. Once we all worked through our hesitancy to use words like “vagina” in front of our professor, the class became both informal and informative. While we covered a variety of attention-grabbing topics – voyeurism, exhibitionism, and sado-masochism to name just a few – the part of the class that made the greatest impact was a far less “sexy” topic (pun intended).
My professor simply outlined 5 principles to guide sexual behavior.
The reason these principles are so profound to me, is because it seems that most of society now takes an approach to sex that basically says, “Do whatever you want, however you want, with whomever you want, whenever you want.” And I’ll be honest, the idea of having a “No Rules” approach to sexuality is very tempting! But when I examine other areas of life, that same “No Rules” mentality can go horribly awry.
Case in point:
Food—Whatever I want. Whenever I want.
Tanning—Whatever I want. Whenever I want.
Technology—Whatever I want. Whenever I want.
As you can see, when good things become all-consuming, it’s easy for them to quickly become unhealthy. It’s normal for me to find Ryan Gosling attractive. It’s not normal to camp out on his front lawn. (Although, if anyone would like to share his home address with me…)
So, what does this have to do with guiding sexual behavior?
Sex, just like any other good thing, can become unhealthy – even dangerous – when it becomes a “whatever I want, whenever I want” type of behavior. Principles of sexual behavior can help us identify appropriate boundaries that will ensure we can enjoy a good thing without being consumed by it.
Aren’t you just so excited to find out what they are?!? Well, my friends, you’ll just have to wait for my upcoming entry:
“Principle #1: Avoid Selfish Pigs and Other Obnoxious Livestock.”
Guest post by Sharon Voss, Naperville Center Director.