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Telling Your Parents You're Pregnant as an Adult

Making a decision about an unplanned pregnancy is challenging enough without the added stress of telling your loved ones—especially your parents. Even as independent adults, we can still be inclined to please our parents with the choices we make. Often times, our parents want to step in as we face tough decisions, offering up opinions that might not reflect our own. When you’re ready to discuss your pregnancy decision with your parents, it can be a difficult balance between making your own best choice and hoping to have their support and praise.

If you are struggling with an unplanned pregnancy, let Avenue Women’s Center be a source of compassionate, nonjudgmental support. For over 30 years, Avenue has helped women in the DuPage County area as they navigate through unexpected pregnancies. We understand that every woman’s situation is different, and we offer free and confidential consultations targeted to your unique goals and concerns. Contact us today to request an appointment!

As you brace yourself for a potentially difficult conversation with your parents, it might help to think through your feelings by writing out the pros and cons of your pregnancy options. Set aside some quiet time to examine each option and try to imagine yourself in different scenarios. How would life look as you envision each possible outcome? What sorts of feelings are you experiencing with each choice? Educate yourself with facts and information as you think things through to better understand potential challenges and solutions. Learning more about your options and their outcomes could ease some of your concerns about each pregnancy option available to you. It’s important to remember that choices aren’t always black or white—there are many factors that will influence your pregnancy decision, and it’s perfectly okay if you feel conflicted.

Before approaching your parents, also think about setting boundaries. These are especially important if your pregnancy decision is different from your parents’ opinions. As an adult, boundaries help you establish your own identity to make the best choices for yourself, despite your parents’ well-meaning intentions. It can be helpful to think ahead about the wording and language you’ll use. Whether it’s a practice conversation in your head or writing out your thoughts, using honest and direct communication can help your parents gain a better understanding of your decision and your feelings about it.

When you feel ready to approach your parents, they may react with strong emotions. This is natural, and it’s important to respect and try to understand their feelings. Our loved ones want the best for us, but it can be challenging to recognize this in the midst of a tough conversation. Despite being an adult, there is often still a strong desire within each of us to please our parents. However, keep in mind the boundaries you established and remember that it’s healthy to express your own emotions as well. Once the conversation calms down, listen to what they have to say and consider their concerns. They still have a lot more life experience and may give you wise insight into possible consequences of your pregnancy decision that you haven’t thought of yet.

Regardless of whether your parents’ opinions align with yours, remember that this is ultimately your decision. And such a major decision is not something that can be based on trying to please other people—even if they are your parents. As you discuss your pregnancy decision, trust in your feelings and thoughts to help guide you toward a decision that’s best for your unique and individual life situation.

As you make your pregnancy decision, know that you do not have to face it alone. As part of Avenue Women’s Center’s pregnancy decision services, we provide a confidential and comforting space to speak with our caring and compassionate client advocates. Allow Avenue to help you with insightful information and a nonjudgmental atmosphere as you make your best pregnancy decision. Contact us right away.

The information provided here is general in nature.  It is not a substitute for a consultation with a medical professional. Before any medical procedure, it is imperative that you discuss your personal medical history, risks, and concerns with your doctor. If you have questions during or after a procedure, your doctor should be immediately contacted. Avenue Women’s Center is not an emergency center.  If you are experiencing severe symptoms, such as bleeding and/or pain, seek immediate medical attention.  Contact your physician, go to an emergency room, or call 911.

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