Are you frustrated with how your unexpected pregnancy has impacted your relationship with your partner? Maybe there used to be romance– thoughtful gestures, kind words, and date nights. An unexpected pregnancy has probably changed a lot of that, especially if the relationship is still new. In the beginning, both partners usually have a sense of excitement about what the future holds. And few things can dampen that excitement as easily as an unexpected pregnancy.
Perhaps your pregnancy has seemingly turned your optimism for your relationship into frustration and fear. It’s natural to feel disappointed about this. However, just because you and your partner are facing these stressful circumstances, doesn’t mean that the romance is gone. It definitely doesn’t mean that your future pregnancy outcome is without hope! It’s possible to pursue a positive outcome for this pregnancy while taking steps to strengthen your relationship. Avenue Women’s Center is here to navigate that journey by your side.
Avenue Women’s Center is a limited medical clinic with five locations in the western Chicago metro area. We provide free and confidential first-step pregnancy services, so women and their partners feel equipped with the information and support they need to pursue a confident future.
Learn more about Avenue and check out our no-cost services! We’ve been a trusted provider of early pregnancy support in our community for over 40 years!
Your Feelings are Understandable
If your unexpected pregnancy has strained your relationship, that’s understandable. This is likely one of the most stressful situations either of you has ever faced. Maybe you’re frustrated with your partner’s feelings concerning the pregnancy and his leanings regarding your pregnancy options (abortion, adoption, and parenting). It’s normal for couples not to be on the same page, especially if they’re still in the process of creating a vision for their future together. Finding the emotional bandwidth for romance in the middle of all this may seem nearly impossible. But it’s not! There’s a deeper kind of romance that can actually thrive under the most difficult circumstances.
Romance Blooms in Unexpected Places
There’s still potential for healthy romance in your relationship with your partner. The ways you view your relationship and engage in romance may simply adapt. Maybe your feelings for one another will grow even deeper. That can often happen when two people face an overwhelming situation side-by-side, and support each other despite the frustration and fear they’re both experiencing. This pregnancy journey could be a true test of your partner’s character (and of yours). If you can navigate these circumstances together and grow in the process, it will create stronger bonds between you than any date night could.
Don’t get me wrong! Date nights are important too. It’s totally possible to continue prioritizing romantic gestures and quality time together. It may just require a little extra intentionality during this particular season of life. Consider writing your partner an encouraging note to let him know you appreciate his support. Or, take him out for his favorite coffee drink (and bring a few fun talking points that have nothing to do with the pregnancy)!
A Word to the Wise
As you navigate this unexpected pregnancy with your partner, it’s important to set boundaries regarding your relationship and the impact it has on your decision-making process. Sometimes, people use romance to mask manipulation. Know that there’s nothing “romantic” or “loving” about making your pregnancy decision for your partner’s sake instead of your own. A truly loving response from your partner will include unconditional kindness and respect, whether or not he agrees with your leanings regarding your pregnancy options.
It’s okay if your feelings toward your significant other change over the course of your pregnancy. Life is always changing, and adapting to these changes is a natural part of being in any romantic relationship. This season of pregnancy is temporary. But you’ll live with the outcomes in a more lasting way than your partner does, so make this decision for you.
At Avenue Women’s Center, we care about your whole story, including your relationships and how they’ve impacted your pregnancy journey. We’re available to process your circumstances by your side, and equip you with the information you need to make your own best choice. Our caring staff would love to be an ongoing part of your support network. Regardless of how your partner has responded to your pregnancy so far, or what the future holds, we’re here for you.
Reach out to us today! Avenue offers lab-quality pregnancy tests, limited medical ultrasounds, and more, all free of charge!
*Avenue Women’s Center is not a provider of professional counseling services. If you’re interested in speaking with a professional counselor individually or with your partner, we can provide a referral.
The information provided here is general in nature. It is not a substitute for a consultation with a medical professional. Before any medical procedure, it is imperative that you discuss your personal medical history, risks, and concerns with your doctor. If you have questions during or after a procedure, your doctor should be immediately contacted. Avenue Women’s Center is not an emergency center. If you are experiencing severe symptoms, such as bleeding and/or pain, seek immediate medical attention. Contact your physician, go to an emergency room, or call 911.